Where The Light Is

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fences

this is the deep and dying breath

give my gun away when it's loaded

the wrong kind of place to be thinking of you

because this road is all you'll ever have

plugin&play If you read, you will judge. the greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return
My Dear we're slow dancing in a burning room	Thursday, January 31, 2008, 10:26 PM When darkness turns to light, it ends tonight. Ms Cumara, the Miss Universe reject. Glascow, gary,me, frodo, lionel, fried. Day 2 of hell. It wasnt as interesting as day 1. Theyre starting to scare me, they made so many emo moments and tried to make us cry, i couldnt help but sense this communist-nazi thinking floating around where everyone was forced to feel some emotions and leak some tears. They tried convincing us of the power of words and chi energy. I dunno, ive always hated it when people try and influence my thinking and try and convert me to some sort of belief and religion or way of life. If i really do wanna be religious and stuff i'll do that on my own, which i am doing, going to alex's church this sat for some cny thing which she invited me to go for. Everytime these people come in in some sort of trance state and try and make me feel emotions, when they try and make it seem as if they understand me, and try so hard to make me believe them, I dont believe them. Theyre all weird retards. I guess i just dont wanna be held down. But once again, boredom hit. And i spent alot of my time drawing and doing the things i love. Soon, i started getting requests from people to draw things for them, well,i had the time. A couple of the sec 5 guys heard me beatboxing and invited me to the sec 5 corner. I love those guys. They share the same passion i share, they love the kind of music i love, so i went over, flowed a little with a few of them. Awesome stuff. Here's a little something i drew for zhiwei. We were all having gastric pains and were all so desperate for food by dinner time. Even though the food was shit. Well, people eat shit to survive. And they gave us straws to stab mini potatos with, apparently its supposed to build our self confidence. Oh yes, next time when im feeling unconfident, i'll stab a few potatos with straws. But urm, me and pereira were too hungry. Kinda took a bite out of that raw potato. It tasted like dust. and this, is a my drawing of our motivator. Dr. Dickhead. And this ladies and gentlemen, prooves once again, what boredom can do to people. Oh yes. Boredom. OK well, im tired as a donkey so i gotta get outta here. Day 3 tmr. The last day. Salvation. Ao Wednesday, January 30, 2008, 9:20 PM Break another heartbeat Superteens camp. What can i say,ive been through alot of boring times before, ive watched paint dry after painting my entire house 2 years ago, ive sat through a 3 hour coversation with my grandma on the topic of teenage clothing, ive endured 5 periods of solid amaths with the most horrid teacher you'll ever find, ive been through boredom hell and back. But nothing, oh nothing in this world can compare to how boring superteens camp is. I swear, if you think you know the definition of boredom, you are wrong, superteens camp. Where can i even begin? Its unfathomable how i managed to survive 14 hours of sitting down in that auditorium being "motivated" without so much as sticking forks in my eyes just for the bloody entertainment and laugh. First of all, all the instructors there think they know every little thing about us teenagers, they think they understand the problems we're facing, they think they can define everything in the world with a couple of sentaces. They think they can motivate us. They told stories of how their camp managed to make plenty of students achieve 8 As for their O levels. I think the only reason why they got those A ones is cos they didnt want their parents to make them sit through this camp again. The entire sec 4 lot was forced to go for this, and that already is a dumb dumb dumb shit move on peter tan's part. Forcing an entire cohord of sec 4s to sit through dipshit camp like this is just asking for trouble. And trouble they got. Throughout, everyone was so rowdy and restless, and the "main man" motivator was nothing close to the viscinity of motivational. In fact, after hearing him talk to us, i feel more UN-motivated. They dont know the definition of the word, they wanna see motivational? Go see people like Will smith or martin luther king. Theyre stuff is motivational. This shit is more like the kind of stuff a smelly underpaid harvey norman salesman would do to convince you to buy an energy saving toaster. Thats exactly what they all looked like. And their english was like the standard you get from a $3 school in hong kong. And everyone was bored to tears. Wanna know what we were doing? Here's the top 5 most entertaining things me and a few of my friends did as entertainment. 1. Remove all your shoe laces and put them all back together again and laugh at the though that you just removed your laces. 2. Play tic tac toe. 3. Play hangman. 4. Draw lines on the paper they give you for making notes. 5. Animate your hand into a talking hand and name it Pedro. Now, this is the kind of stuff people do when theyre in jail. When they have absolutely nothing left and are so bored, they would think of the word " pneumonia" and all have a good laugh at how the p is not pronounced. And there was this camera filming everything and putting it on a screen in live time, so its double the boring talk. Sometime at 4 pm when were all at our peak of total boredom, we started doing the stupidest things, me and barney made signs out of the note paper that said stuff like "where is the love", "feed me" "a hungry man is an angry man" and the best of all, "I wanna go home please". And we flashed these signs everytime the camera passed over our heads so everyone saw them and were laughing like mad. Sigh, can you blame us? its our only form of entertainment. Heck even the teachers were laughing cos they were so bored too. jeez, we were all suffering. And this is only day 1. We have 2 more days. And they talk about stuff like how to manage our self esteem, how to draw diagrams, how to think positive, showing us the power of words and other dickweed crap. And theyre all psychiatrises or however you spell it. This is exactly why my ambition of becoming a psychiatris always changes. You know, i think i'll become a journalist. For the NY times or something. Anyway, here's something i drew out of boredom. Argh, just to think. its less than 12 hours before i gotta go back to that jabroni monkey crap hole of a place. God save us all. Ao Tuesday, January 29, 2008, 6:25 PM And the sun will shine on you. Have you ever seen the moon so clear? Godsend. :) I was pretty pissed off in the morning cos some asswipe teacher gave me detention for taking the lift after school yesterday. What the hell man, it was after school and i was rushing off for drama after my amaths re-exam, i was so late man, and this piece of card had to catch me for taking the lift, and he caught me via security camera. Now, hundreds of boys take the lift be it school hours or after school hours, and if teachers do catch them they always just shrug it off and let them take it. And this cock had to catch me not even in person, but through camera. Who the hell stares at a security camera screen to catch students taking the lift? And i dont even know who it is, i was suddenly informed of it when i reached school. That unreasonable son of a desiesed dog. And ive never gotten detention before. In all my years of education, ive never been into trouble with the school. And now, my first detention will be of the stupidest reason ever. if i go for detention, id rather go for like, assaulting a teacher in unarmed combat with a cobra or something. But noooo, i get sent cos i took the lift. Like, hello, have you seen my size? you want me to run up 5 levels when im late and be all sweaty and get a cardiac arrest? That biyotch is one hell unreasonable ass. And today, the principal caught 5 guys taking the lift, and he just smiled and let them go off. Jeeez. Anyways, i'll try and persuade this fella whoever she or he is to not give me the detention. Caught 27 dresses with lynn today, and its a really really good movie. I dunno, something bout the film thats so charming and romantic, and nice, and just so, wow. Im a real sucker for romantic movies. And i dunno, the fact that it was in NYC just made it all so perfect. Ahh i have SS assignments to do, or else tang will chew all our asses. I better get started. See yall round. Ao Monday, January 28, 2008, 8:02 PM Its the sweetest stae of motion that i ever knew Sigh. Why oh why in the hell did i give liz my password to my blog. Sorry everyone, its not me who posted the last post. nor was it me who edited my other posts and so on and so forth. So if anything strange gets posted, its not me. Its demon lizzie. well, i had the Amaths retest today, and i think i did pretty alright. I studied like hell for it, but thats only gonna get me a pass i think, its just too complicated. Every single question was on a different topic so yea it was kinda challenging, not to mention i had to rush off for drama rehearsels and CNY concert rehearsels. So now im so tired i cant be bothered with my homework, which isnt good cos i shouldnt let other things get in the way of my studies. Pfft i sound like my grandma. Speaking of which, i had dinner at her place last night (like i do every sunday with my whole family) and she had a surprise for all of us. Her sister had come over all the way from Holland. Yes that makes her my grand aunt, and she is dutch. You see, my great grandfather was a very promiscious person and had a few wives, and he had many children, so he decided to make many different children of different races and scattered them all over the globe, then he got filthy stinkin rich through trade and found a school. That school would be ACS. Which would also explain my very extensive and queer family background. My cousin also came over yesterday all the way from San fransisco, and well, my cousin's gay. He married a man named Albert. I shit you not. How great is that? I have a gay cousin. And well my grand aunt was pretty cool, she's one of the most smartest people ive ever met in my entire life. Im dead serious. Her memory power is like, amazing, she remembers how she met my parents when they were still dating and the clothes they wore when she met them. A yellow blouse and skirt for my mom and a white shirt with jeans for my dad. And she told me how she used to bathe and feed me when i was a kid. Feed me. yes. feed me. So shes the culprit for my blubber. And she speaks dutch, german, chinese, malay and french. She taught me abit of dutch. Ah. Interesting family i got. You know sometimes you get those annoying pop up ads. I get them quite often, but today, i was feeling pretty anxious about the results of my test, amongst other things, and the most apt ad popped up. And it was this. Mentalhelp.net I didnt even know that existed. Well thanks i guess? It made me smile. Well, i have maths to do. Seeyuh. Music : Fat Joe ft. big pun, jadakiss, nas, raekwon - John Blaze Ao Sunday, January 27, 2008, 9:33 PM Cry me a river CHRIS AND ANDREW THINKS THAT LIZ ROCKS THEIR WORLD (: , 7:11 PM Rock the town, scream out loud. Elysebeth is so interesting. She told me her neck put on weight. Wow. True love (and other lies) says: and i swear my neck put on weight okay Ao says: haha so hardworking Ao says: your neck put on weight? Ao says: how does ur neck put on weight True love (and other lies) says: i have no idea True love (and other lies) says: it feels fat True love (and other lies) says: srsly. Ao says: HAHAHA Thats great liz. Your neck put on weight. Once again, ignore the below post. Its liz and her insanity. Ao , 6:27 PM Come on love, run with me I LOVE AMANDA (: haha amanda i know you're happy. but don't be too happy darl. (liz here btw) & To the person that is so fking persistant in calling me, stop it alright. I don't want to have anything to do with you. Zlich. Nada. Zero. We've parted ways so go MYOB. Jesus. Since you have " so many friends to go out with you don't need me". And i happen to not need you either. How nice. Saturday, January 26, 2008, 10:47 PM What hurts the most, is being so close. Maybe we werent meant to be ok? Maybe we were made to break. Maybe all we have and had was never meant to be anything more than a painful memory that will never come close to anything we may ever dream of imagining? Where's the good in goodbye? Will questions ever be answered? Perhaps. But maybe then something more might come out of that, and the answers we once thought would be the saviour to all our doubt become nothing more than dust, dust flying in the wind. And in that moment, we wish we would not be seen, in that moment, just for that one point, you wish you were invisible, cos maybe then you would be free. But maybe we werent meant to be free. Maybe we were all meant to pretend, disguise, hide, lie, lie and say we are ok. I am ok. Ao Thursday, January 24, 2008, 10:26 PM I dont wanna miss a thing The release of the O levels results was today and wow, it was one heck of a tension filled place/ Everyone there was so nervous. Saw all the seniors again and it felt great, havent seen them for ages. And this time round, my school did pretty well, lots of distinction rates went up and all, and tim and nick did awesome, both got 8 points. Well done Tim and Nick. Prash and V got 14 and 15. Well done them. And well, i felt scared for them, but lots tears in the end, some of joy, some of sorrow. But still, tears. clap clap all of you. Smart people. But. There is one major congratulations that is reserved for a good friend of mine. A very close friend also from drama. He scored the highest in the whole school. Hes also in the papers s one of the top scorers for the Os. He is none other than Manraj. With an amazing score of 8 A1s. Im amazed. And in total shock. So, well well done manu. Heres a pic of the happy boy himself. And this ladies and gentlemen, prooves that IQs do exist above 500. And he was perfectly calm about it, he didnt even shout. He was all prim and proper, and took like a man. Id have been screaming around and beating up tables and chairs. But ive noticed one thing, and its prolly something alot of you know, cos its something us barker boys are so famous for. its that our chinese really really sucks. Peter showed the total scores for the school, and all the subjects had distinctions of around 30-40 percent, and always a 99 percent pass. All of course, but for one subject. Chinese. With a distinction rate of 5% for 2007. 0% for 2006. 0% for 2005. and 3% for 2004. Oh yes. Barker chinese rocks. 5%. pfft. That is literally 1 student who got an A for chinese. 1 out of 3000. Notice how even the top boy of acs barker who got 8A1s scored a C6 for chinese. haha thats just really amusing. Well, acsbr has a reputation. Oh and urm, do ignore the below post. Its not me. Its friday tomorow. :) Huzah. Seyuh. Ao p.s. Lizzie, im really reallyreallyreallyreallyreallreallyreally reallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreally reallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreally reallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreally reallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreally reallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreally reallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreally reallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreally reallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreally reallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreally reallyreally sorry! , 10:11 PM Pretend you're alive. Never leave my side for this roller coaster ride and im waiting for the only thing i know and im watching for your shining light to glow,Yes i've been watching out my window and waiting by the phone It may seem a little out of time but im tired of being alone,we'll walk hand in hand arm in arm i'll be your shield protect you our of harms way and I know i ask a lot of you but now all i need's for you to stay. to amanda wong pui ean, the love of my life. I am only doing this because this is my punishment for using liz's sacred name to say a fugly guy was cute. And unless i do and say those things, she wont forgive me. :( Shes a sick evil person. There Liz. Happy now. Ao Wednesday, January 23, 2008, 10:34 PM When we're out together dancing cheek to cheek Cumara, me, Jon Au. Ah im in a jazzy mood, got sinatra on my itunes. I swear his music is classic. Drama again today, today was with the newly recruited 24 sec ones, and it was near to hell. Those kids wont shut up. They wont. Whats wrong with kids? Sigh, yes i know, i was once a kid too, i was once idiotic and stupid and noisy and immature. Pfft i guess this is how my seniors felt about me. Ah. Then after drama me and committee headed down to the cafe as we always do, and we stayed there for a real long time. till like, 730. We were so high. Good relaxation time. Which is not good, cos i cant be relaxed, relaxed means im gonns slack. Ahhh. i must get to studying. You know Heath ledger? The guy from brokeback mountain and the guy who plays joker in the new batman film? Well, he died yesterday of a drug overdose. No im not pulling your leg, i got a shock too. hes actually a pretty good actor, its so sad to see these people just die like that. Really got me to thinking how short life can be. Its not the first time ive got to thinking about this, but hey, the more the merrier. Rest in peace Heath. Ive been listening to alot of motown classics from people like stevie wonder, benie segal, earth wind fire, van bcboy and all that, and theyre awesome. I love those golden oldies. Oh and, there was this guy i saw on barrio 19 a couple years back, and today while i was browsing round youtube, i finally found him! Hes a beatboxer and one of the best in the world i reckon. In fact, id say hes the best, his style is really good and his flow is tight. Go check him out, he's faith sfx. He sure beats joseff and rahzel, killa kella is just getting monotonus in his beats, and roxorloops is good, but his flow isnt there, beardy man would be my second fav choice in the beatboxing world. i know you're not gonna have any clue bout what im talking bout. But its ok. Im off to go wallow in my jazz. Seeyuh. peace. Music: Frank Sinatra: Cheek to cheek Ao Monday, January 21, 2008, 9:36 PM I got sunshine on a cloudy day I am so pissed off with hotmail. I created a new email, cupidtoldme@hotmail.com , so i wanted to import all of my contacts from my current email into this new one, but it cant work. I dunno why, for no damn reason, its not working. And theyre not helping me at all. Gah. Die hotmail. Die, die,die. This is frustrating. Yesterday, i decided to go to the nearby coffeshop to see what kind of interesting people i'd see. I gotta admit its pretty fun to see these quirky characters bustling around trying to sell you things. Like this drinks woman, (are all drinks women on crack or something?) she came up to me, and well, said this. (Andrew is sitting on table silently laughing to himself) Drinks woman: Ah boy ah, yao bu yao he shuai? (translation: Boy, would you like a drink?) Andrew: urm, what do you have? Drinks woman: wo men you cock, sprite, selenup, (translation: We have coke, sprite, seven up.) Andrew: im sorry? Drinks woman: cock. cockacola. cock float also have. (translation: coke, coca cola, coke float too.) Andrew: Cock? Urm, its ok, maybe later. Drinks woman: ha la ha la lai em zhi lep kong say bo.(translation: ?????????????????) Pfft. Cock float. id rather drink ink thank you very much. Im not going back there again. And i met this guy who wore a steering wheel on his neck, i understand the concept of bling bling, but, a steering wheel? And he had a bruce lee hair cut and a car nuber plate on his belt. I wont be surprised if he came up to me and repeated the phrase "soyoyo" 3 times and skipped away. Sigh. The people in this world. We are all so, Diverse. Mr darren hasnt been turning up for rehearsels, and hes the second teacher in charge. I asked him why, and he said he'll appear in the most oppurtune moment like gandalf the white. Gandalf the white. Pfft, try Gandalf the Wide. Anyway, im thinkin of switching to eljay, im quite sick of blogger, in fact ive already made an eljay account for quite some time now. But i dont wanna change anything else. My new email is screwed up. And im so not used to eljay. I'll stick to blogger for now. But soon, i might change. Alright, i need to rest, today's been a whirl pool. Seeyuh. peace. Music: Goo goo dolls : Iris (go check it out cos everyone loves this song) Ao Saturday, January 19, 2008, 11:36 PM When everything's meant to be broken, i just want you to know who i am. Argh facebook's lagging on me. Today was a day filled with idiots. OK maybe not the whole day, but just the evening part. Went to dinner at lagoona, and the place was packed as usual with people, but today, the people to idiot ratio was like, 1:1938761. I swear. The satay noodle man was cooking so slow i couldve walked to India and back and still not have the food cooked and ready. The que was ridiculas, it was so long that it cut into the other stalls' que and people actually qued in the satsy noodle que when they thought theyre were queing for the chicken wing stall. Gosh. And this woman came up to me and said, "You want sugar? Sugar sugar lai lai, jia eh pua boi" and she blabbered on in some jabroni language. Shes actually the drink stall woman, but she was trying to sell me sugar? What? Are you sure its sugar you're selling and not cocaine woman. Then, while i was happily having my dinner with my family, enjoying the yummy stuff with the egg and oyster and what not, the whole of little india decided to come to lagoona for dinner. Now, dont get me wrong, i have nothing against indians. In fact i love those buggers. But all of a sudden, a whole flood of indians strolled in and surrounded my table even though i wasnt done eating, and those twits just waited around my table staring at me waiting for me to finish. I wasnt even half done with my food. And 3-4 of them kept staring at me and giggling to themselves thinking im dumb enough not to notice it. And i know it, they were teasing me. Bloody hell. And to make things worse, one of them was this young woman who had so much white powder on her face it made her look like the walking dead. And the guys looked straight out from the nightmare before christmas. Bleugh. They ruined my night. So lets stop thinking bout these over powdered creatures, and lets move on to the later part of my night. I went to best denki to get a new phone for my house cos my current one is screwd beyong reckoning, and i saw these bunch of kids on crack. Now these days, alot of kids are hyper as hell, jumping around bouncing on their ass cracks and screaming. But oh i tell you, these bunch of kids i saw are not just any ordinary idiots. Theyre the kings and queens of idiocy. They ran around the whole place like its a playground and played with all the stuff there like the keyboards and electric drums. I was gonna try out the electric drums, but 2 of these jabroni pieces of monkey crap came and snatched the drum sticks away and started banging on the drums with as much rythm and timing as an 80 year old dog suffering from a major case of hypertension and cerebral palsy disorder. I swear, and they actually thought it was music. And they just attacked everything, the piano, the cameras, everything. Where were their parents? My guess is, they left them there and ran away. Look, heres 3 of the pose' of idiots. yea, i took a picture. i couldnt resist. Those idiots were just so, intruiging. . . . . . . Notice how that man is just staring in disbelieve at the complete retardation of these kids. Best denki, i have only 1 thing to tell you. Sue. Theyve tainted the image of best denki. Sigh. alright, no more. Im calm now. Bought tees from and1. Theyre actually pretty cool. I might catch the slingers game tomorow, ive got 4 tickets, anyone wanna come? pfft. Anyway, i got stuff to do, i should be studying, like, really. Im slacking too much. Seeyuh round. Peace. Ao Friday, January 18, 2008, 8:18 PM That's all i ask of you Ish, Jo, kenny, Ao. Sleepy cat Gets sleepier And falls asleep. There's something coming out from ishaan's behind. Kenny kenny chameleon Rehearsels were in the theatre today, so we got out first taste of what our performance venue would be like. Gah i dont really like it. its hard to project in the theatre, cos its bigger than the drama theatre. I saw sheila's plan for re-designing the theatre stage, and gosh its gonna be expensive. We're gonna get a revolving stage, and since the theatre doesnt have curtains or wings, shes putting in curtains and wings. Ahh its gonna be alot to handle this time round, gotta study hard while doing the musical, got dances, songs and the play to remember. Heavy stuff. Today, was an appreciation lunch for the sec one mentors. We had pizza. Alot of pizza. I didnt eat all of those boxes. I swear. i only had 3-4 boxes. nahh im kidding, i had 3 slices. Thats all. tsk, really. Tgif! Finally, friday's here. The weather's so awesome, its windy and cold. Just what i like. Hope it stays like that forever man. There's this kid in sec one, he's bald, hes small, and hes named Albert. I swear im gonna name my son Albert, albert is so cute. The name, not the kid. Ok so Albert the kid is cute too, but i get more cute vibes from Albert the name. OR how bout Alberto? Just rolls off the tongue. Ok im not making sense, so i'll seeyuh when i seeyuh. Peace. . . . . Ao Currently listening to: Queen-Bohemian Rhapsody Thursday, January 17, 2008, 8:04 PM My tea's gone cold im wondering why i got outta bed at all. Hmm why is everyone going to costume parties? is it costume party season or something? Surrender to the night, says: ANDREW! Surrender to the night, just sent you a nudge. Ao says: helloooooo dear Surrender to the night, says: OMG DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING THAT I CAN BORROW TO A COSTUME PARTY?!?!?!? Pfft. Liz, you're a girl, (i think) i doubt i'll have anything you can wear. And Song just came over to borrow some bling and baggy t shirts to his costume party. And he's going as a rapper. He even asked me for hip hop lessons. Sigh. The homework still floods and it goes on and on and on. It wont end. Why wont it end. Gah. There are tests everywhere. Why. WHYYY. Life's been soooo boring, my life is like, a boring car ride. Have you guys seen the original batman and robin series? Well, their costumes never fail to make me laugh. here's what i mean. ladies and gentlemen, the coolest superhero duo ever, the original batman and robin. hahaha. Theyre wearing spandax. I may vomit. Wow. They must regret doing that. Mm we released the names for the people we chose for drama today, and it was madness. All the sec one boys who auditioned were insane. it was so hard just to paste that one piece of paper with all the names. Well, we picked 19 people in the end, assuming the dropout rate is a bout 10, that should leave us with about 9 people. Not too bad. But you know, us at the drama committee, all 5 of us, we're such hardworking people. This is what we did today during our intense meeting after the audition results release. Oh yes. We hanged teddy. See what boredom can do to people? Boredom kills. Pfft im talking rubbish arent i? im tired, and i got 235 pages of 1100 words to do for english. Seeyuh. Peace. Ao Tuesday, January 15, 2008, 7:08 PM Is this the real life? is this just fantasy? Damn my health issues, damn my headaches, damn it all. Ive been having migraines every day and it sucks, but strangely, im not really feeling much pain, i guess im too used to it. But the blur vision is still annoying, i pray it stops today and never comes back. Ever. Homework is flooding my life, its real intense. it wasnt so bad last year, but now i guess, the stress grows. And its just so ridiculas, our mid years are in April. Tsk. They call it Mid years for a reason you know. Its that peter tan, hes doing all this. Pfft. Im trying not to scream and shout and just burn the school down, or pull it apart, brick my bloody brick. i spent the whole afternoon cleaning out my room, all my old books and what not are gone now, so its less messy. Next thing i wanna do is tear of all the stuff on my walla and re paint my walls orange, then use black paint and paint all over it. And just re-vamp the whole thing. But its gonna take time. Tests and assignments are all over the place and theyre coming. i just feel it. I gotta go study now. Seeyuh martians. Ao Sunday, January 13, 2008, 5:45 PM I could lay awake just to hear you breathing. The 4 stages of Andrew's hair over 2 weeks. Boon Boon Well its been a while hasnt it. Anyway its been an interesting 3 days, did lotta things and today im down with a stomach flu again, woke up with a terrible pain in my abdomen which led to the quick release of fluids and solids through my obscenely large behind. But you didnt need to know that. Ive been sleeping the whole day, so there goes my sunday, i was supposed to study today. Tsk. well done andrew. You moronic twit. yesterday i watched beauty world the musical and i gotta say, its pretty damn awesome, the music was great (you know i love my 60s music) and the whole feel of it was great, saw ivan heng again with the usual homo smile, he said hi to me and hugged me. I was scared. Ivan hooked us up with front row seats, so thanks ivan. Though he may have ulterior motives fot doing that. Hmmm. Then came home for a quick shower and headed off to uncle baskhi's new house which is huge. Dad went crazy with his guitar again, and i of course was a puppet to their delight, doing card tricks over and over and over again. It helped alot that they were all drunk, so it made the illusion even more extraordinary. Ate like crazy, and i think it was the stale nuggets that caused my stomach flu, but oh well, its ok, at least now my tummy hurts too much to eat anything at all. Woopee. Then on friday, school was crap again, homework here and there(which i should really get started on), teachers with their usual nuts in a knot, stuck up and unhappy. Well, who can blame them. After school, went to seoul gardens with sam, bala, fried, wei sheng, chiam, gary,boon boon and frodo. Awesome food again, and it was sam's birthday, so happy birthday sam. Pfft, that was so enthusiastic. Anyway. Viv's gonna be on makansutra, if thats how you spell it. (viv's my cousin btw) Ahh not fair, she gets to eat all the food, but she told me that they dont actually finish all the food, they take 2 bites, and the camera crew digs in. Tsk. If i have my own food show one day, that aint gonna happen. ive been on music highs. I dunno, i guess its so unhappy in school that i look forward to the smallest of happy things. like being able to sit down on my sofa and just sing. Aussie family moved in next door, they seem pretty cool, i love their accents. its so, aussie. well, i better get started on my homework before i get killed. Seeyuh! . . . Currently listening to: Aerosmith- i dont wanna miss a thing . . . Ao Thursday, January 10, 2008, 6:41 PM Can you take this silence like a pill so that i can breathe? Baldies. yeaaa thats right. I shaved. I dunno why either, its kinda this thing goin round in my class where everyone's shaving. So today, me and pereira shaved, pek shaved cos he got caught for long hair. I guess thats what spurred us to shave. And now, chee, fried, pek, pereira, zt and me all shaved. And not just us, but the whole waterpolo team shaved too. Hmm. The weekend's almost here! Finally. Alright, tuition teacher's here, gotta run. Seeyuh! Ao Wednesday, January 9, 2008, 10:36 PM Jiyin says: i swear, if you die. Jiyin says: when i die, and i meet you in heaven, ill kick you. :( Ao says: haha haha that made me smile. Play like a gamer, fuck like a pornstar, study like a nerd, live like a hero, die like a legend. Ao , 9:03 PM 6 months 8 days 12 hours since you went away. I left school after the first period today, had a really bad migraine again, and i thought they went away forever, well, it sure came back today. I hate migraines, you get blind spots in your vision, you feel giddy and nauseaus, you cant hear properly, and your whole head feels like exploding, and it feels like your eyes are being pushed into your head. And you start puking alot. it sucks. I did alot of research, and i may have a blood clot in my head, which of course means cancer, which leads to death. But its alright i guess, if i die, i die. Dont plan on telling mom very soon though, i dont want her to worry. its all very complicated, my blood pressure's pretty high, so a vein might have burst quite some time back and the blood might've clotted up, and migraines is a symptom of it. All the symptoms of it match mine in fact. Which does scare me. i had a nightmare yesterday, i felt trapped, like, i lost everything and i had nothing left, and i was cold. So cold. What does this all mean? I pray for answers but i got none, ive been asking for years, maybe i should ask nicer? Well, it doesnt matter anyway. Nothing matters. Enough of all this emo crap, like i always say, live life to its fullest, one chance, one shot to make it all happen, you cant miss it, you got a dream out there go get it, no regrets, no looking back, leap and hope to God that you fly, cos otherwise, you drop like a rock, all the way down. Live while you still can. Believe me. These few days have been alright actually, its not so bad. Not that stressful, or not yet at least. The new principal peter tan's been getting everyone off on the wrong ball, i gotta sayt he was a pain in the ass in junior, and hes an even bigger one now. hes trying to change the school,hes trying to change our attitudes. Hes trying to make us better people, pfft, many have tried. Hes making things too strict i think. And he banned fried food in the canteen. tsk. How dare he. And that means one shop has to close down, that means the ques get longer. The ques. Do you know how long they are? Theyre so bloody long they can circum-navigate the globe 3 times and still have enough length to serve as a belt for all obese people in the world. And that biyotch doesnt care. Its so bad, you can que up there and only get to the front 25 mins later, i had to resort to cutting the que. In fact, everyone has, if you stand in the que, i gaurantee you in 5 mins you'll be cutting the que, or else, you're just really dumb. Cos everyone's cutting the que its hilarious. I wonder what peter's gonna do bout it. Ive actually been studying, like, wow. I have an A maths re-test end of jan. Lets go baby, all out. Im gonna get back to my music now, i'll seeyuh when i seeyuh. peace. Ao p.s. i ate some chocolate today. =) Tuesday, January 8, 2008, 11:00 PM I guess im down to my last cry Watch this. This is why Brian McKnight is the best singer ever. And lizzie found the audio for me. yay. love you lizzie. :) Ao Monday, January 7, 2008, 8:11 PM I hate this song because it was written for you. Some pics from the ship. Oh the good times. Gah, sorry, i know i havent been updating much. Im just to caught up with school and drama. School seems to be passing rather quickly, hours feel like minutes and i dunno why, maybe its cos everyone's more serious, which makes me more serious, which makes me bored, which leads to me feeling like time flies. hmm. And now, im taking pleasure in the simplest of things, like having 5 minutes alone so that i can listen to my music, and my music, its never felt so good to drift away before. its kinda funny how when we're so free and happy, we miss out on the small things in life, it is in these small things that we find true happiness. And i sound like a heretic. Caught i am legend yesterday, while walking into the theatre, i heard at least 5 people saying that the movie was called im a legend. Tsk. Especially while buying the tickets. " Im a legend at 7 30 please. 2 tickets." Im a legend? Tsk. Idiots. Idiots everywhere. Everyone's so busy, so so busy, everyone's like, dying. its 4 days till the weekend. Pfft how pathetic am i, im counting down the days to the weekend when it just ended. Well, chocolates in the fridge that have been uneaten since christmas, i promised myself id loose weight. i must. i will. Just you watch and see. Ao Friday, January 4, 2008, 8:16 PM You got me feeling like a child now. These past few days have been so crazy, ive been really busy with all sortsa stuffs, and i come home so dead tired. But its a good thing, cos im so busy, i dont have to go to class at all. Well, i guess the first few days were'nt so bad, things went pretty well actually, i walked into the courts in the morning and it felt awesome, everyone there was my junior, finally, im sec 4 now, the oldest amongst the whole school, except for the sec 5s, but theyre only one class. Class hasnt changed much, same people except for some changes, pereira still up to his clowning, pek still the same, everyone was the same. No change whatsoever, it felt like school in 2007. I had sec 1 mentoring and drama stuff to do, so that means, when my drama stuff finished, i had to go to mentor the sec ones,so i never once had lesson. Huzah. Auditioned people for drama on wed, i swear some of the sec one kids are idiots. They cant follow instructions and theyre quite blur. but its ok, theyre only sec one. it was pretty boring too having to be in that stuffy small cramped room for hours watching loads of sec ones coming in 10 at a time reading from a stupid script which only had 1 line for each actor. I swear i heard the sentance" I dont want to die" a thousand times. Its insanity. see, the situation was that they were on a plane about to crash, and all of them said their lines with a big smile on their face and kept laughing. very nice. laugh and smile when you're gonna die. Pretty disturbing. But its ok, theyre only sec one. Then yesterday was the performing arts' mini performance for the sec ones to persuade them to joining one of the five performing arts. And we put together a piece so last minute, it was scary. We only rehearsed this 1 minute quick ad 3 times, and surprisingly, it worked pretty well, it was slick, quick, and cool. And i think it was pretty successful, we recruited 35 people today. But they need to go through a second round of auditions, so says sheila, because she wants the cream of the crop, the best, the most talanted. Pfft. Good luck. So i guess the first day wasnt as bad as i thought. But still, you know. We had dance audtions for drama today, it was pretty alright, our instructor is this 5 foot 5, tight t shirt wearing muscle man who's like, this super hip hop dancer. He taught us a short routine to learn on the spot and perform, and it was hilarious to see everyone try and dance, some of us did pretty well, but some of us looked like disney on ice on steroids. Its been very slack yes, these 3 days. But im afraid thats all im gonna get for relaxation, cos next monday, its to the slaughterhouse. Earlier on, while we were all relaxing at our cca booth, and engaged deep in conversation, madam said the funniest thing. Kenny: I bet he's like raj! haha! Andrew: wait wait, is this instructor a male or female? Ms sheila: well, he's a female and ive worked- (very loud laughter) Oh yes. He's a female. That can only mean one thing. Haha. Joke of the year. You shoulda seen her face. here's the dogfather. We took it while he was having his nap after his very very very tiring action of cutting out the letters R and A from paper. Dogfather: Eh i did alot of work ok, i cut out the letters for the sign. Andrew: yea, 2 letters. Dogfather: woof. No he didnt really say woof, he just shook his head and went to play with the table cloth. But i thought it'd be appropriate to represent his queer actions. The sign says" New attraction, ishaan" Haha. I didnt put it there, amiel did. Sigh, bless. alright i gotta get outta here, the weekend's here! so im gonna be quite happy. Intense drama rehersels start next week, 3 times a week, maybe i'll loose some weight. Hmm, well, im outta here. Seeyuh! Ao Tuesday, January 1, 2008, 7:53 PM If it takes the rest of my life, baby i will wait for you. Here we are once again, at the end of the begining. School starts in 11 hours. And its gonna be busy, im booked up for the next 3 days. i gotta hold auditions for our musical, gotta be in the sec 1 orientation taking the little idiot kids around, and got rehersals. Well, at least i dont have to attend classes. Whoopee. Ive been spending the last few hours in my room, got jay-z on replay on itunes, and it feels like we're all going to war. But if i go down, i go down with a fight. Mom's nagging again, its driving me insane, see what school does to people? Sigh. Just got my new school books today, i actually forgot about it. Pfft. well don andrew, go to school with no textbooks. Restocked on the pens and the paper pads today, along with other stuffs i need. My hair is still looking like jabroni monkey crap. in fact, its getting more jabroni monkey crappish every day. Sigh. All thanks to my gay barber pedro. Actually, his name's kevin. But i like to call him pedro. So pedro just cut my hair in this new fashion, but apparently it doesnt really suit me, so i gotta really spike my hair for me not to look like steven hawkings. Alright, here we go. Time for me to sit on my bed with my music and wait for it to come. The drums have sounded, we can feel it in the air, we know its going to come, we march towards the sounds of war, guns blazing. Break out the fire, school's in. Ao , 3:57 AM For auld lang syne, my dear, for auld lang syne. So this is 2008 huh, doesnt feel like much of a change, the world still feels the same, same air, same thoughts, same cold cold hearts. But still, happy new year, here's wishing everyone out there one helluva rocking new year. its 4am now, got back from ming's place an hour ago, it was pretty fun. Popped over to her place like i do every holiday, sushi and all arrived a bit later, not everyone was there, usual company. mark brought his new girlfriend who's like, 1/3 chinese, 1/3 french, and 1/3 english, and mellisa brought her fiance, this super cool brazilian dude. Ming says he's cute. well hey, maybe they being sisters can share him. pfft. Sushi left halfway to go clubbing with mike and all, so ming and me were the only under 20 kids there. Uncle paganito with his usual italian accent telling jokes and advising me about wine, dad with his guitar and his usual life of the party thing singing and joking around, had the whole place laughing, ah yes, thats my dad, and as usual, me and ming stayed in the room cos like, we're young kids. We watched dumb vids, googled hot guys and girls, talked rubbish, gossiped here and there, sang. Fun fun. And she showed me her hardworking project which made me laugh so hard. She had to make a book on some lit thingy, so she made a book on my fav greek myth of the minotaur, theseus and hippoltya and all that, and its like a children's cartoon book with hand drawn pictures of all the characters and colouring in 26 different colour pencils. Wow, well done ming. Such hard work. I must admit, the drawing's were pretty good, its quite good how she managed to draw the same character to look almost exactly the same whenever the character appeared again, even thought all the characters were looking forward and not once did they turn to their side, and the babies looked like fish, and the minotaur looked like godzilla, but its ok. Look, heres a pic of 3 of them now. And heres the killing of the minotaur. Very nice. Well done Ming. And poor her, she lost her purse the other day, and its not just any purse, oh no, in her words, its " a very special purse that has polka dots, but not the factory kind of polka dots where theyre all the same size and same spacing, but theyre all different sized dots and like, randomly placed." Oh yes, so the speciality of her polka dots is their the dot size and dot spacing of each individual dot. Nice. Ah its so late now and i should be sleeping, but heck it, its the new year. And i know i really shouldnt be doing this, but i just made myself a bowl of noodles, cant blame me, im starving, besides, i had very little to eat for dinner. Well, 2008. its too fast, just, way too fast. But hey, like i always say, live life to its fullest and no regrets, never miss a chance, take what you can and never look back. I must say, its been an amazing year, all the new people ive met, all the new leasons ive learnt through life, all the mistakes made and all the achivements. I never thought id be where i am now. Everything i could ever ask for has come to me, ive changed so much from what i was, become so much more aware, so much more careful. For once, i can say i have no regrets. Ive fulfilled my goals, ive done what i need to, no regrets. No regrets. Let's see what 2008 has for me, in i go, plunging into the raging war once again, but this time, i have new weapons and a new mind, be ready 2008, we're gonna kick ass. its getting late, so id better be off to bed, this is it, the last day of the holidays, wow. it was worth it, all of it. We'll go down guns blazing. Good friends, good food, good times, good night. Ao		the machiavellian ist Vanity isn't a sin, a little narcissm wouldn't hurt. The World would be a much lesser place without corndogs and pizzas. Facebook Andrew. Music. Food. People. What more could you possibly want?		partnersincrime One day when i wake up and find the motive and time to link anybody, i'll let you know. backtoyesterday + Truth is, babe, I love you too. + Sometimes I walk out the door with a smile on my f... + Moments are a lot more real than what you make the... + Only when you can separate the mind from the heart... + Life is becoming a day old chewing gum that's gone... + The world has too much to say sometimes. Every ind... + It's starting to get dark now and the world around... + The heart is thrown into a free fall and the very ... + I've pictured that moment before. About one year a... + Hero. You think you're getting somewhere, slim, bu... wheni'mgone + April 2007 + May 2007 + June 2007 + July 2007 + August 2007 + September 2007 + October 2007 + November 2007 + December 2007 + January 2008 + February 2008 + March 2008 + April 2008 + May 2008 + June 2008 + July 2008 + August 2008 + September 2008 + October 2008 + November 2008 + December 2008 + January 2009 + February 2009 + March 2009 + April 2009 + May 2009 + June 2009 + July 2009 + August 2009 + September 2009 + October 2009 + November 2009 + December 2009 + January 2010 + February 2010 + March 2010 + April 2010 + June 2010 + July 2010 + August 2010 + September 2010 + October 2010 + November 2010 + December 2010 + January 2011 + February 2011 + March 2011 + April 2011 takeabow An accidentality production Inspiration from DancingSheep & BONBON:D		theventingmachine