this is the deep and dying breath
give my gun away when it's loaded
the wrong kind of place to be thinking of you
because this road is all you'll ever have
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plugin&play
If you read, you will judge. | ||||||||
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My Dear we're slow dancing in a burning room |
Wednesday, July 30, 2008, 5:08 PM
I hope you dont mind that i put down in words
Its prolly like, a thousand degrees in the shade. Gosh. I swear this world's coming to an end. And we're all gonna get fried. Like chickens jumping in a vat of hot oil. Tsk. Of all days, i had to get a migraine today in school. Thankfully it was towards the end of the day and i didnt have to leave halfway, cos my parents prolly wouldnt have believed that i really was having a migraine. I hate migraines. Theyre a killer ass of a headache. Your eyeballs will feel like theyre being pushed into your head, the back of your head will start to feel as if someone's squeezing it, and your vision will be blurred so badly you wont be able to see anything. And on top of that, you'll feel like puking every 30 seconds. And i had to get it during a math test, which by the way we seem to be getting a test 5 times a week, tsk, the school calls it "constant checking for readiness for the exams". I say thats just their way of saying "this is your last year in school, we hope you've enjoyed the last 4 years, but now, die." Gah. So i cabbed home straight after school and dropped dead on my bed without even taking my shoes off. I woke up an hour later completely healed. Thats the thing about migraines, they come and go so unpredictably. But it usually speeds up the recovery if i sleep. You know, during a migraine attack, your body rejects all foods that enter or that have entered your body, it starts to push back food inside your stomach into your gullet and you start vomiting. So essentially, you're gonna have nothing left in your stomach. So when you're healed, the body naturally wants all that food back, in other words, you get hungry. Well, i got hungry. And you know, when im hungry, there's very little anyone can do to stop me from eating. But i realized there's nothing to eat in the house since Mom's going in for her operation tomorrow and dad, well, he only shops for apples and bread, both of which he forgot to buy last weekend. So here i am, dying of hunger, with nothing to eat till dinner. I dont like the sun. No really, i dont. Its driving me crazy. There's sunlight streaming in through my windows and straight onto my head, not making me feel any better. Sigh. I had really depressing marks for my last math test. geez im gonna fail my O levels,become a road sweeper and live a sad existence with 5 cats, cursing every morning at the walls and if people tell me "good morning", i'll reply "whats so good about the morning." Im going slightly mad here, can you tell? GAHHHHHHHHHHH. Stab the ministry of education.  Stab them all. Pfft. Im going to chemistry now. Its prolly the subject im most prepared for and can actually feel good about myself when i do chem papers. Seeyuh. ao Tuesday, July 29, 2008, 5:35 PM
Pulled my trigger now he's dead
I didn't want to go to school at first cos it seemed like a waste of time, many periods of useless subjects on. But i went anyway. And it really was a waste of time. After school, headed to parkway for lunch with pek and sam chew. We decided to eat at the sakae buffet,which starts at 3, we arrived a little too early at 10 to 3 so we went to hmv for a while to check out some Cds. I wanted to get an AC/DC album but i decided to save my money. Sakae was awesome. Even though i ended up paying th gst and service charge for both of them which added up to 10 bucks. And somehow along the way a few dollars went missing here and there. I ended up paying 35 bucks. Tsk. Now im feeling all broke. But anyway, the buffet was like, yay. Yeah you know how i feel about buffets. We ate, and ate. and ate. Halfway through we got bored so we started playing with the computer menu. You know how the screen is always at the sakae menu programme and never at the desktop? We tried exiting the programme, tried everything we possibly could but concluded that it was impossible. We did however manage to catch a glimpse of the desktop by shaking the programme box around. This is what its like normally.  And this is what its like when you shake it around.  You can see the orange background of the desktop. Yes we are entertained by the cheapest of thrills. We couldnt stop laughing at the fact that we managed to view the desktop. pfft. And then we went high with it and started placing orders for the most expensive foods there at the maximum quantity and then started laughing at how ridiculously expensive it all amounted to.  You cant really see it but its about 400 bucks per box of sushi. And there are about 4 boxes there. We never entered the order though. We did want to place the arrow over the "enter order" button and leave it there, then leave a note at the mouse saying click me. =) After awhile, i decided to throw an entire bunch of wasabi into my wasabi dish.  And this gave me an idea. I dared Sam to eat that entire bunch of wasabi in 2 bites. He said he could but didnt want to, naturally me and pek scoffed it off as an excuse for being too scared to eat it. Then, Sam did the strangest thing ever. He said "If you're good at something, never do it for free". It took me and pek awhile to realize he was quoting the joker. So i agreed to give him 10 bucks to eat it. But still, he refused. So i halved both the portions. And he agreed to eat half of that amount for 5 bucks.  Drinking water to prepare himself for the big eat.  We know he'd do anything for money, but whats this, hesitation? Hmm. But then.  Boom. He ate it. I didnt catch it a picture of it, but i caught a video. And since my computer's being a bitch and not allowing me to upload it onto youtube, i shall reserve it for some other time, for now, just picture sam throwing that chunk of wasabi into his mouth, then have a good laugh at his stupidity/bravery. And yes, i gave him 5 bucks for doing that. Sigh. I didnt go to school today cos i think i ate some bad sushi yesterday, my stomach hurt like mad last night and this morning. I cant really pinpoint what i ate that gave me this poisoning cos i kinda ate everything. But im feeling better now. My new desk arrived today. =) It looks super. Although a bit big, my room's a bit squeezed now.But ah well. Dinner's calling me so id best not ignore it. The days grow shorter to the O's. Am i prepared? Hell no. I'll seeyuh when i seeyuh. ao Sunday, July 27, 2008, 5:41 PM
But i can't remember where or when.
Also bought this mini drawer set for my new desk, since its from Ikea it was all like, assemble yourself. I spent a good hour and a half last night hammering, screwing and sliding it into place. Im surprised my neighbours below didnt complain, ive concluded that they're all just nice people or all in a deep coma. The good thing about this chest of drawers is that, its a design it yourself thing where its all blank and plain and up to me to design it. I like things like that, gives me an opportunity to go art crazy.  Thats all ive got so far, but, im working on the rest of it. I also got a new scent candle which smells like heaven. Its this thick blue vanilla scented thing which is like, brilliant.  I dont quite know why i took a picture of it. I think i need to study more than i am, i look around and i see everyone else mugging like the O's are in 30 seconds, but hey, sooner or later it will be in 30 seconds. I saw an alien yesterday at Ikea while having dinner. So there i was, sitting at the table waiting for mom to arrive with food, and out of the corner of my eye i see this figure walking towards me, i slowly turned expecting to see a man or a woman, but i saw, It. Intriguing Terrestrial. His head was huge, larger than any normal humans head should, it seemed to stretch to the sides, elongating it width-wise, his eyes were thin and stretch, pupils extremely dilated with the whites of his eyes barely showing, his front 3 teeth stuck out like knife, pointing out of his mouth at a 45 degree angle, and he had a small frail body. But the worst part is, he was wearing a pink pokemon tshirt. I was so stunned im surprised my jaw didnt fall off my face. So i thought, how bad could it be, until, the rest of his family showed up. Mother, father and his other younger brother. I swear if i hadnt known better i wouldve thought the earth had been taken over by martians. To make thins stranger, his brother and him started playing some imaginary gun game where they kept going "pew pew pew" at each other. Sigh. Someone save us all. Ive got to do math now. =( I leave you with pictures i took with my new found skill of making light lines. Seeyuh.   Ahh, its the attack of the giant neon sperm.   ao Saturday, July 26, 2008, 6:01 PM
Sweep the streets i used to own.
Victor: hahaha yeaa true! Mm hell yea, rebel!! :D Munky: haha yea her oh so cool i love bad boys t shirt :p Yea i wouldnt be surprised if it really was. Pfft. Dizzzzzzzgustttting. Liz: ahh shoot me too. S'ok woman, you're gonna get 9 points remember? :D Tim Kek: yeaa tell me bout it .Sigh. Ah well. Kat: haha yeaa! :D Yupps! That is, if i get below 20 points! haha. mm thanks my mom's better now :D Jiyin: Jiyyyiinnnnnnn! :) Thanks dear, we're gonna form a band remember! haha. Yess see you soony soon. Mucho love. :p Amiel: Yes. Like, oh my gawsh. Its totally Tim. :) Tim: haha its kendoboy973@hotmail.com :) And thanks, you guys rocked it out too. We all did. Audre: haha thank you. :) Thanks for coming down to see us! :D N: haha thanks! :) :) Now that thats done. Ive been really busy with work and stuff, you know the usual student studies crapota, im not gonna expound further cos you already probably know what im talking about. Mom got out of the hospital yesterday, her second op will be sometime in the first week of August at another hospital (thank God) and not the super high quality one she was at. She was so happy that she got discharged, that straight after getting released, she went and bought herself a new handphone. Not just any handphone, but the samsung omnia i900. Its the closest thing to an iphone in the market. Tsk. Knowing me to be an opportunist, i did what any smart opportunist would do, i asked her to get me a new handphone too. It didnt work of course. But she did agree to get me a new watch. A watch ive been wanting t get for quite some time now. And she got it for me. Hooray mom.   It cost about $400, but mom was feeling rich. Well done mom. Ah well, who's complaining? =) So after that, she decided to treat me to a wonderful Japanese lunch which i was desperately in need of. You know how i love my lunch. We ate at some japanese place, cant remember the name The food was awesome, but the music that they played sounded like a cross between a techno christmas charol and an extract from pokemon game music. Pfft. And the singer had that annoyingly overly happy bubblegum disneyland kind of voice that makes you wanna throw bricks at her. Gah, anyway, didnt go to school yesterday, and so did like, 20 other people i know. Half the day was gone for prefects investiture, and the first half had a double period of PE. No way in hell am i going to school just for PE. So i thought, screw it. It was productive really, i stayed home to study after going out with mom in the after noon for the watch nd the japanese lunch. I have this friend, her name's Sofie, she's a friend of mine from new york and i havent spoken to her in years, so i was quite surprised when she started a conversation with me outta nowhere. And, she told me something i thought no one would ever tell me. She said im not fat. Who the ball sac will have the convinced illusion that im not fat? Apparently, its Sofie. I shit you not.  There, i printed screen straight away. I had to capture evidence. Im quite touched by it actually. noone's ever told me im not fat before. Anyway, i was on the phone with Liz that night, when suddenly, she broke out in a scream. now, taking into consideration the fact that the last time she screamed and burned holes in my ear, i thought someone had jumped into her room to stab her, but it was just an insect. So this time, the first thing that came to my mind was that an insect had flown into her room. Gosh, i was spot on. A flying beetle flew into her room. Clap. Me: Just kill it, like, squish it or something. Liz: Nooooo i dont want to, then i'll have to clean up all the icky beetle stuff. At this point, somehow and quite coincidentally, a yellow beetle also flew into my room. Pfft, this is like some sort of sign. I concluded that beetles are psychic and are able to telepathically hear all our thoughts and if they wished to, could pinpoint our locations and swarm in for an attack. Last night, i was experimenting with my camera, and i finally figured out how to make that cool effect where you can see light lines.  Alright so it looks like the vision of a person on crack, but still, its a start. Im going to Ikea now to go find a new desk, my current one's a hand me down from my grandma and it looks like a rusted metallic chunk of robocop. I'll be seeing you. The days grow shorter to the doomed day when all hell starts. We wait on the edge of what we cannot escape, slowly inching our way into the darkness towards what we cannot yet can see, outcomes of what we cannot imagine to be anything other than mere warnings and precautions. Then it hits us. Complete breakdown of our minds in the form of a piece of paper. And so the war has begun. Emo moment ends here. Tsk, im hungry. =( ao Wednesday, July 23, 2008, 10:12 PM
I know you're out there, somewhere out there.
Which is way better than the dump she's at now. Today, went to visit her with dad after collecting my dsa acceptance letter at acjc, and normally there's this creepy long haired man in the container next to mom's, he's always staring at me when i walk past. But today, he wasn't inside his container anymore, so i thought he got discharged, but it turns out, the guy was dying of AIDS and passed away this morning. Like, i was hit by a wave of surprise, sadness, sympathy, sorrow, and sickening fear. I mean cmon, you see this creepy long haired dude who stares at you every time you walk past him and one day when you walk past him again you find out he's dead. Gosh. I dont even know his name, but to whoever he is, rest in peace mr long haired dude. Not to mention that entire place was built as a holding area for sars patients during the sars epidemic, im not sure exactly how many people passed away in that area. Either from sars, aids, or suicide cos of the horrible food. No honestly, if they gave me that kinda food in a hospital, id go burn the place down. You'd think im just exasurating, but look, the hospital labels this under soup.  That looks more like it came out of a pond. Unless they consider pond water soup, i dont think that actually is edible soup. Plus if you stared long enough, you'd see tiny moving particles inside the pond water. Pfft. Yesterday, caught the dark knight after school with cumara vish gerald ling and WC. I gotta say, it really is awesome.You'd think everyone's only saying its good cos heath ledger died and everyone's sympathizing over it by giving his last movie great comments, but its not just cos of his death, he really did a sensational job with the joker. While batman continued with his asthmatic phlegm congested voice, the special effects of everything was better, the storyline rocked, and 2face has just got issues with coins. So go catch it, you wont be disappointed. Recently, the school's made this new rule that we're gonna have to wear school jackets and only school jackets, nothing else. Tsk. I wouldnt mind that if the school jackets looked cool, but it looks like a sick clown got high on crack then threw paint all over a white jacket. And theyre not nice colours either. Plus, it looks like something my grandma would totally love. Pfft, what is up with all these new school based crap rules man. Peter tan just wants us all to be united, but cmon, first its the stricter haircut rule, then its the school socks, and now its school jackets?? Why not just change our school name to Anglo Communist School dammit. Apart from our physical shapes and gender, we all look alike now. Sigh. I just realized how annoyingly close our O's are, its like, shit close. And im still here, posting to you people. Sigh. No but i am studying. Really. I am. I think im going slightly mad. So forgive me if my recent posts or posts ahead seem to be coming from a stressed and hungry boy who's loosing his mind. Ive got Amath to get back to on my desk, so i'll seeyuh when i seeyuh. ao Monday, July 21, 2008, 7:54 PM
The city spreads open like a cut vein
 Notice how insignificantly small i look in the little corner. The one and only time where i am not obscenely large. Pfft. Liz is telling me how nice her cough medicine is, tsk. That shit's addictive. Ah well. I found out something today, apparently barker should have won at the BOB, something about the judging criteria in which our criteria level was raised by 100 points cos we've been winning the past 2 times, so we actually beat acsi by a good 100 points, but according to the criteria, we cant win. We also got 50 more votes than acsi did. You'll prolly think im making this up cos im bitter at our lost, but, im not. But its ok, the winning part's only a title, what truely matters to me is that we know who won. People dont need to know that. A title is just a title. It doesnt need to be written on a piece of paper or shouted out by thousands of screaming fans. All that we need is the comfort in knowing that what we did at the end of the day paid off and that we truely won. So i say, what the heck, let them win the title. Give them the glory for once. Until theyre satisfied with the title, we'll just be sitting here watching. Im sorry if that all sounded strangely emo/ powerpuff girl-ish. But ive said what i have to. last night, the most random thing hit me. I thought, why not do some artsy collage crap. Here we go, this is my artsy collage crap.  Other than that, i got a call from acjc today telling me i got the dsa. Yes, whoopee. Now all i need to do is study my large arse off till the O's come. Im in the midst of tuition hell right now, feli just left and im waiting for vader to arrive for a 2 hour math death marathon. Tsk. If i ever meet the guy who invented the O levels, i'll kick him in the head. My brain's not really working too good now so dont blame me if what im posting makes entirely no sense either. I forgot to sleep last night too. You know, it must kinda suck to be a pet fish. I mean, you spend your whole life stuck inside a stupid tank with odd humans staring at you with the occasional poking of the glass bowl, and the only kind of thrill you can look forward to is the food being thrown into the water, which kind of sucks, and even if you wanted to commit suicide by drowning yourself, you'd realize you cant cos you're like, a fish. Pfft. next time you see a fish, go say sorry to it for its pathetic life. Ok Liz is gonna have to put down the phone soon cos vader's ETA is in 3 minutes. And im gonna have to try and finish the rest of his homework. So doth end the pointless post. Seeyuh. ao [EDIT] So, i just walked up to my dad telling him i need an excuse letter for last friday cos i didnt go to school cos of sports day. I feared the worst and that he might refuse to lie for me. But. Me: Yea i need you to write a letter saying that i was sick on friday, just say that i had a headache or something. Dad: What?! Me: *in my head* Ohhhh shit. Dad: Thats your excuse? A slight headache? Come on thats a pathetic excuse. Tell them you had acute spinal pains in your lower back and you couldnt get up from bed, that way you can say you weren't sick, you just were unfit for physical activity, so it makes more sense for you to be able to go for your battle thing at night. Me: Wow. Dad: You think you're the only one who cut school without a good reason hmm? You gotta learn from the best boy. Like, ok. So my dad used to skip school when he was in school too. Fantastic. Excuse me while i go find our morals. =) [End of Edit] Saturday, July 19, 2008, 5:07 PM
Even the best fall down sometimes.
acsi came in first. Us, second. Congrats, fire away samson. Sure we're disappointed about it, but we're not bitter. They've been playing for a longer time and probably came more prepared than us anyway. The judges probably saw them as more versatile than us cos of their acoustic, but i must agree, their acoustic song was brilliant. We kind of know the truth, but we're not supposed to say it, just for the sake of the keeping of peace amongst both our schools and to not leak anything bout the judges. We know who the true winners are. Thats just about good enough. But it was a good experience, the barker section of the crowd was amazing. Thank you to everyone who came down. Thanks Kat and Jon for making it! Thanks Liz and all. Chris and his girl. Audre, brig and Andre. Thanks Jiyin :) And my absolutely spectacular class who've always supported me no matter what. You guys rock. The crowd really was insane and i had never performed in front of a more insane crowd than that. Usually in a play, you get really mature audiences who are sophisticatedly prim and proper. But for Battle of the bands, you get drunk druggies with no morals. I guess it makes it more worth while. None of us went to school yesterday except for barney, it was sports day and well, some asshole signed me up for swimming. No way in hell is anyone in this known world ever going to see me swim. Ever. Met Yuresh at bugis first to grab some grub, Tim joined us later and we headed for the studios for a short jamming session before our actual show. Met Uriah, Deej and Josh at the studios and we jammed for about an hour, then headed to bugis junction to grab some lunch. Yay, lunch. Then we slowly made out way to acsi. We were an hour late, but ah well, all good rock stars are always late. Barney met us at acsi then we had a short briefing before moving to our band rooms. It wasnt long before we started the full run of the thing. We screwed up a few times in the middle of rock n roll so we got quite worried, especially Tim who had become a complete nervous wreck since the day before and wouldnt release his tension until he knew we were ready. So, quite alot of intense silent practice from us in the band room. We noticed that the teacher left the test papers on the table, so we decided to look through them. I swear acsi guys are insanely smart. The test was upon 21, and the average score was a 20. The lowest in class was like, a 10. It was so rare and so amazing that i had to take a picture of it.  Notice how there's a huge chunk of paper missing on the top left hand corner of the paper. He must've been so depressed over his results that he decided to bite his paper. Poor dude. Then we went to the board, and we noticed something.  See how the title "Vice chairman" was once "class racist?" Haha. Anyways, Soon enough, it got to dinner time. The dinners they gave were absolute rubbish. I think it was chicken rice, but the chicken was bright yellow and the chilli had bits of grey material inside. We decided that they were trying to poison us and so ordered pizza instead. Yuresh brought his finest whiskey, johhny walker gold label which he has been saving for 2 years and decided to bring it for us. It was some strong ass stuff. But no i didnt get drunk, only had a little bit of it. So those of you who thought i was drunk cos of my red face and insane high spasmistic behavior, well, thats just how i am before and during a performance. Yuresh was totally smashed though. DJ and josh then decided to get helios drunk, so they kept giving cups of whiskey making him think it was coke, and he drank it all, and soon enough. Boom. Helios was drunk. Helios: Dude im not drunk man. DJ: never trust a drunk person when he says he's not drunk. Me: Ok, how many fingers am i holding up? (i was holding up 3) Helios: 3! (i then quickly put up my last finger to make it 4) Me: No its 4! Helios: (staring at my fingers) Ohhh shit it is 4! Oh my god im drunk. Yes. The test wasnt to see if he knew how many fingers i was putting up, but to see if he could notice my last finger popping up. Apparently he couldnt. Ah well. We really did go all high. I bought 27 bucks worth of candy and we all just kept shouting to get psyched up. Then, before the show started, we ran to all the other band rooms shouting "good luck" at every single person we could find and shaking their hands. By the end of it all, im quite sure everyone was under the illusion that we were drunk. Ah well. We were the first band to perform, and our first song was a little dry according to Liz, but we enjoyed ourselves and most of the crowd was singing along to cant take my eyes off you. Then came the other bands. We basically did nothing for the rest of the time before our second song other than running around wishing everyone good luck again. Liz and chris came to say hi during the intermissions cos i gave her a backstage pass, she assaulted me, jumped on me and threw me to the ground, people stared at us. Tsk. Im not giving you a backstage pass anymore liz! hmph. Our second song was totally awesome. We got the whole crowd going, and at the end, our barker supporters started chanting. Halfway through, some people started chanting "AC, AC! AC, AC!" Which honestly was quite dumb cos there were 3 different ACS schools competing. Clap clap. Then, there was only the long wait before the results. Only more madness backstage, running around, greeting people. Bumped into Kat and jon, i totally didnt recognize kat at all until she said hi to me. And Jon, he beat me in the height game now. :( Ah. At least i beat him in the weight game. Then, the results. ACSI came in first, followed by us, then acs international, then SJI, then HCI. After the results, we went backstage and back to our rooms, in a daze of disappointments and broken spirits, but at least we had a blast of a time. Jiyin found me backstage and passed me cookies. Yay, cookies. Which i just finished. Oops. Dad fetched me home after that and i went straight to bed for i had an audition today. Today's audition was awesome. Thats all i can say. awesome. =) Battle of the bands was a great experience, and this is not the last you'll hear of douch dunder. After the Os, we're poppin back into the music game. Here we come world. And now, pictures.  Barn, Tim, Deej.  International on stage.   Douch Dunder   Sound checking before we go onstage on the sound check day.  Yureshhhhh. In our band rooms.  Dinner! Yay! Dinner!  Uriah, Yuresh, Josh  Hungry uriah.  Our candy stash!  Our secret stash stash   Rockstars baby   Thanks for the rose Liz, i was just kidding about it, but you got it for me anyway.  My cat wanted to eat the rose.  Performer!  C is for cookie.  Woohoo! Well, i think i should introduce the band. This, ladies and gentlemen, is DOUCH DUNDERRR!  On bass we have Barney. Probably the only person in this world to hold the title of that name. He looks oddly like a woman in this picture. Hmm.  Deej, our super awesome rhythm guitarist.  Tim, one of the best guitarist ive ever seen in my life. Rock on Tim.  Uriah on drums. Somehow he always manages to look comical in all his pictures.  Me, im on keyboards and im fat. And last but not least  Yuresh on lead vocals. Douch dunder! A name which we finally decided on although it sounds like a german condom brand, thats perfectly fine to us. Liz is calling me now, and vader's coming soon. Its back to the books again. Sigh. It was worth it though. I'll be seeing you. ao |
the machiavellian ist
Vanity isn't a sin, a little narcissm wouldn't hurt.Andrew. Music. Food. People. What more could you possibly want? |
partnersincrime
One day when i wake up and find the motive and time to link anybody, i'll let you know. backtoyesterday
+ Truth is, babe, I love you too. + Sometimes I walk out the door with a smile on my f... + Moments are a lot more real than what you make the... + Only when you can separate the mind from the heart... + Life is becoming a day old chewing gum that's gone... + The world has too much to say sometimes. Every ind... + It's starting to get dark now and the world around... + The heart is thrown into a free fall and the very ... + I've pictured that moment before. About one year a... + Hero. You think you're getting somewhere, slim, bu... wheni'mgone
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An accidentality production Inspiration from DancingSheep & BONBON:D |
theventingmachine
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